A fresh start and a clean slate…

by chelseawattsny


When I first started writing this blog, which was barely any time ago at all, I had two things in mind: one, I wanted to journal my own exploration of what it is to live a dynamic life and two, I wanted to stick to a schedule of posting every Friday by midday (EST). It didn’t take more than four weeks for me to go off the rails on both counts. The first place I went from there was to Mt. Make Myself Wrong – wrong for my last blog post (which I thought was not up to par with the first two…really Chelsea?), wrong for not knowing what to write, wrong for missing my Friday “deadline” and wrong for quitting. Whew! That’s a lot of wrong making, enough to make you want to just scrap the whole damn idea, right? Actually in the past those few thoughts would have been more than enough reason for me to quit and run away. And here’s where the beauty of living dynamically really kicks in…I’m not confined by what I usually do or what I’ve done before. In fact, by definition in a dynamic lifestyle the whole point is to constantly push past your limitations, optimize what you’re already doing well and consider new actions to take and paths to travel and know yourself as limitless. Yeah! (insert cheering stadium)

With my internal compass realigned, I spent the last couple weeks looking into why it suddenly seemed like I had nothing to write about…and it all started the Friday of my third post. By this point a handful of people had started following my blog, some that I knew or knew of but mostly people I’ve yet to meet which I think is super cool and is an indication to me of technology’s ability to connect and unify humanity…but that’s another post for another day. The point is I started having an expectation of myself to write amazing posts and inspire people! Oh yeah…and not to write about anything too controversial so as not to make people uncomfortable or to tarnish whatever nice ideas people currently have about me. (Soapbox Note: In general, I find expectations of any kind to be more limiting than helpful in the way we tend to utilize them. For me, expectations are most useful as blinking lights indicating buried beliefs I hold to be true and which might actually be standing in the way of me experiencing a life I love). At any rate, I don’t see much use for self-censorship and people pleasing in a journey to explore limitless living so here it is, my previously restricted topic of exploration: non-monogamous living and open relationships…duh duh duhn

This is actually a topic I’ve been exploring since last spring – I’ve read books about this, journaled about this, explored this in conversation and finally in my relationships – so it’s funny to me that I would stop myself from sharing my questions of and experiences with non-monogamous living and open relationships on my own blog. All the funnier because for many people that I talk to that’s just the way life is and they seem surprised that I’m only now considering a non-monogamous lifestyle. Then there are the people that I’ve excluded from this conversation because I’m “certain” they wouldn’t approve/understand/be interested/etc. and I’ve been afraid of losing their love/support/approval. The amazing thing is it’s through exploring non-monogamy that I’ve come to experienced that when I am present, authentic and vulnerable in my relationships I create the space for myself to experience a limitless abundance of love, connection and acceptance. My heart is open to all beings because I believe that LOVE IS LIMITLESS